Dearest Georgetown Day School community,
I know I was gone for quite some time—five devastating, never-ending months—but I’ve made my return at last. During my leave, I spent my days sitting patiently in the Forum, inside the lost-and-found bins and even in the library, eagerly awaiting the moment when one of our beloved community members would drop a statement just politically incorrect enough to be deserving of a broader platform. As a committed journalist, I’m certain it’s my duty to create such a platform—to give voice to those who ultimately do not know I’m listening. But I always am, with my ears open wide, and it’s my pleasure to present to you the precious gems I’ve overheard.
“I don’t want to go to college. I want to be a mafia wife.”
“School is all fun and games until someone poops in the Forum.”
“Our butt prints were so different, but equally beautiful.”
“I started an email to a teacher with ‘Ahoy!’ Don’t take advice from me.”
“You’re telling me with a straight face that George Washington was a white man? I do not believe it.”
“My main food groups are dairy and tomatoes.”
“My dog got electrocuted once.”
“So did my roommate!”
“Imagine if he married Helen Keller. I feel like that would be a good duo.”
(Speaking about Mozart.)
“Does anyone else kinda want to join the military just for the Lululemon discount?”
“Drugs or not, GDS is my home.”
“It was so much easier teaching in prison.”
“Just please don’t create a real dating profile for Tycho Brahe.”
“I think my dog might be Amish. I can’t remember.”
“Don’t make me execute you in the Forum.”
“Oh my God, please do!”
“I’m doing a thumbs up with my foot, if you didn’t notice.”
“I only check The Augur Bit to see if you published your ‘Overheard.’”